If you’re wondering what women find attractive in men, whether physically or mentally, you’re at the right place. We’ll cover what girls like based on science and research.
It’s not always to understand what women truly want, and there’s sometimes a big gap between what they say and how they truly feel, but based on my research on this topic that spans several years, here are my findings when it comes to what girls find attractive in guys (in no particular order):
#1 – Overall Confidence
Lacking confidence is something that girls can pick up almost immediately. It’s not something that is tangible or visible. It’s a feeling. Someone that is confident radiates a different type of energy and women can feel it.
As a man, you need to work on constantly improving your confidence, which is not easy because results aren’t always immediate. However, it’s a journey all of us must take as early in life as possible because results compound over time.
Men can usually build up confidence by fixing what they’re self-conscious about. For example, if you lack confidence because of your weight, get to the gym. If you lack confidence because your teeth are crooked, get them fixed. If you lack confidence because you don’t have any money, get a job, etc.
There’s no magic formula when it comes to confidence, you must fix the root cause. I understand that the root cause isn’t always obvious, and we’ll cover this topic deeply in another post.
#2 – A Nice Smile on a Masculine Jaw
We combined these two together because they go hand in hand in giving you the smile that no woman can resist!
We all know that smiling is key to attracting women. Why? For many reasons, but the main reason, in my opinion, is that smiles are contagious. When you smile honestly and openly, the girl instinctively smiles back, and that makes her feel good.
A wise man once said: women aren’t attracted to a YOU, they’re attracted to how they feel when they’re with you. Let this phrase sink in for a minute because it could be a game-changer in your life.
Let’s be honest though, no matter how honest and frequent your smile is, it likely won’t go far if your teeth are all messed up. When it comes to having a great smile on a physical level, it usually involves:
- Straight and properly aligned teeth
- Pearly white and shiny teeth
- BONUS: Masculine jawline
If you can combine the 3 elements above, you got yourself a killer smile that will claim a lot of victims (in a good way)! When you have a smile that good, your only objective is to show it as often as possible. It’ll do most of the work for you and help you compensate for other areas that you might be lacking in.
If you don’t have a smile that meets these criteria, you need to get to work NOW to fix it, as results may take months or more! Straightening your teeth may involve something like Invisalign or Smile Direct Club. For teeth whitening, it’s a bit easier. You can achieve it rather easily using whitening strips or a simple home-made toothpaste solution based on baking soda.
For a square and masculine jawline, there are many exercises you can start doing today. Check your testosterone levels too, as a masculine jawline has been associated with T levels and overall weight.
#3 – Protective & Masculine Traits
Women are hardwired to look for safety/security in men, so they are instinctively attracted to guys that make them feel safe and secure. All the following traits in a man give women that sense of safety and security:
- Being tall
- Being fit/muscular
- Being financially successful
- Being dominant and showing leadership traits with other men (e.g.: having a managerial-type position at work, being a leader in a sport or being a business owner.)
- Having many friends and being likable/popular in a social setting
All these traits subconsciously tell a girl that the man she’s with will be able to provide her (and her children!) with physical/financial/emotional protection. This is the #1 thing that makes girls fall in a love with a guy. Nothing also comes even close to this sense of security.
Your job as a man if you want to attract women is to have as many of these qualities as possible.
I understand that height isn’t something you can do much about, but you can compensate for height by doubling down on fitness or wealth.
Also, if you’re below average in terms of height, perhaps you can consider wearing shoes that can give you an extra inch or so. She’ll never know until you take them off, and at that point, you’ll probably be in a horizontal position anyways so height won’t matter anymore. 🙂
Also, as I said before, if you’re short you definitely need to compensate by hitting the gym and bulking up. While tall guys can still attract beautiful women even if they’re skinny/fat, short guys generally have no choice but to be physically fit if they want girls to look past their height and give them a chance.
#4 – Being Funny
This goes back to what we said earlier: women aren’t attracted to YOU, they’re attracted to how they feel when they’re with you.
If you’re funny, they’ll laugh, and if they laugh, they’ll feel good, and if they feel good, they’ll love being with you and will want to be with you more often. It’s that simple. Comedians have an unfair advantage here!
If you’re not the funny type of guy, you can at least compensate for your lack of humor by smiling a lot. Smiling will do just as good of a job as cracking jokes, and in fact many women prefer the calm and quiet guy that smiles often, rather than the goofy funny guy that’s always cracking jokes.
#5 – Intelligence, Wisdom & Culture
This isn’t always as important for younger girls, but as women age, they start to become more sapiosexual, which means they start to find intelligence, culture, and general knowledge attractive in a man.
Let’s face it, no woman wants to be with a guy that can only drink booze and talk about sports! It’s not only boring, but it also reflects badly on her when she introduces him to her friends and family.
Girls want to be proud of their man and want to feel mentally stimulated when they’re with him. It doesn’t mean that you need to be talking to her about splitting atoms or the thermodynamics of combustion engines, but at some point you probably want to go beyond the mundane small talk and show her that you have depth.
Things like having a Ph.D. or speaking more than one language are obvious signs of intelligence, but even things like teaching a woman something new will make you instinctively more attractive. If a woman learns new things when she’s with you, she’ll appreciate it and want to see you more often.
# 6 – Looking Sharp & Clean
How you look and smell will either attract or repulse a woman within the first few seconds of meeting you. Things like:
- Your haircut. Is it nice/stylish/clean-looking?
- Your clothes. Are they clean, well-fitting, and stylish? Suits are what women find the most attractive in men so consider getting yourself a tailored suit.
- Your smell & breath. Do you smell good or do you smell like a men’s locker room after a hockey game? Women will pick up on your smell before you open your mouth. Speaking of mouth, do you have bad breath? That will kill your chances with any woman right off the bat. Make sure you chew some gum or a minty candy before you approach a woman, especially in a closed setting where your breath bacteria will certainly make it inside her nostrils. Oh, and avoid onions and garlic before you go meet that girl, for the love of everything that’s holy.
#7 – Being Bold
For example, approaching a woman on the street in broad daylight to tell her that you find her attractive takes a lot of guts, and a woman will appreciate it even if she ends up NOT giving you what you want.
Being bold as a man and going after what you want is a very masculine trait that girls find extremely attractive in men. Being shy and scared will do the opposite and turn women away.
A lot of women will claim that they don’t like bold men and find them annoying when they approach them in random places, but this is an example of how there’s sometimes a big gap between what a woman says and how she truly feels. Even though she may say that she doesn’t like it, there’s a part of her that finds it sexy, but she will never admit it.
What Girls do NOT find attractive in Guys
Now that we covered 7 points that will definitely make you more attractive to girls, let’s cover what will NOT make you attractive, despite what some people may say:
- Being too muscular. There’s a line not to cross when it comes to fitness. Multiple studies and surveys have shown that women like a fit man, but there’s such a thing as being TOO muscular, and women will be turned off by you if you reach that level.
- Being too aggressive. Being a little bit aggressive is great, especially in the bedroom, but many men try to cover their sense of insecurity in a public setting by being aggressive, loud and obnoxious. This is a major turn-off as it shows the woman that you’re insecure and cannot control your own energy. It’s better to stay quiet and mysterious, even if you’re seen as shy, than to make her uncomfortable by being overly aggressive, loud and rowdy.
- Flaunting your wins and successes. Women hate a man that only talks about himself and takes all the attention away from her. There’s a proverb that says: discovery trumps disclosure, which means that it’s better to let a woman find out about your successes by ASKING, rather than hearing you talk about all of them because you want to show off.
That’s it guys, now is the time for you to get to work to make sure you are exuding all the right traits and avoiding the bad ones.
Becoming attractive to women is a journey that will take you a long time, possibly all of your life, but it’s a very rewarding journey as you’ll learn skills along the way that will trickle down in all areas of your life, not just in romance.
